February 27, 2005

Just because I'm here in Israel doesn't mean I stop being a Cubs fan.

Phone lines were jammed and computers were working overtime as the first day of single-day Cubs tickets went on sale to the public.

Officials at SBC Illinois said there was a huge spike in call volume around 10 a.m. -- when the tickets went on sale.

According to the local phone company, Cubs fans dialed the ticket sales hotline nearly 260,000 times in the first two hours tickets were on sale. By 2 p.m., more than 1.76 million calls were made.

No other local phenomenon has matched that volume of calls since the first season of "American Idol."

February 24, 2005

Wall Street Journal column that proves Richard Daley really is related to Rudy Guliani.

The Falcons should sign Plaxico Burress immediately.

February 22, 2005

Recently I've been overcome with a longing for the good ol' United States. In light of this, I thought that perhaps compiling a list of the things I miss the most might help ease the pain.

Top Ten Things I Miss About the USA

11) Target
10) Sundays
9) Free Colgate
8) Sushi
7) Paycheck
6) Abe Lincoln
5) Super Target
4) Cary Sherman
3) Health Insurance
2) Net Flix
1) Charmin
1) March Madness

Here's your no-so-typical Obituary for Hunter S. Thompson which appears in today's WSJ and written by Tom Wolfe (Electric Cool Aid Acid Test). It's actually a pretty good read.

Anybody want to write a one page essay for me stating why I merit financial assistance from Nefesh B'Nefesh? Accepting all applicants. Please respond immediately.

February 20, 2005

From Scrappleface.com Feb. 16, 2005

Jimmy Carter Attack Sub Armed with Nerf Missiles
by Scott Ott

(2005-02-16) -- The U.S. Navy on Saturday will commission its newest nuclear-powered attack submarine, the Jimmy Carter, with many new features, including multiple-warhead Nerf missiles.

President Carter, who brought peace to the middle east, vigorously defended America's right to give away the Panama Canal and, in 1994, convinced North Korea to abandon talking about its nuclear weapons, said he's honored to have his name on "one of the most powerful peacemaking devices on earth."

Jimmy Carter is the first of the American Seahare-class subs, featuring a high-tech sonar system which alerts enemy forces to its presence and a safety device on the Nerf missiles which allows firing only after an enemy missile impact.

"This new generation of nuclear submarines is designed to use trust in our enemies as our first line of defense," said an unnamed Navy spokesman.

President Carter has invited leaders from North Korea and Iran to the commissioning ceremony, during which former First Lady Rosalyn Carter, in a time-honored Navy tradition, will give the first order to "man our ship, bring her to life then park her over there by the dock!"

February 07, 2005

My mom's story appeared in today's Jerusalem Post. Enjoy.

If you need a ID and password, use mine.


February 06, 2005

Well, I've been in Israel exactly four months now and many people ask about the biggest difference between living here versus the U.S. While there are many things that stand out, one thing is perfectly clear. You get much better boogers here.

February 05, 2005

"If the prisoners aren't released, we will return to the cycle of violence."
- Palestinian Authority Minister of Communications Azzam al- Ahmed

They've extended their hand in peace...


If anybody wants to enjoy a Cubs game with me at Wrigley Field any time between June 22 and Aug. 10 all you need is the tickets. Good seats only. No obstructed view. Bleachers are fine. I prefer day games.


My Mom's story appeared in this week's Atlanta Jewish Times. Read it.

Shavua tov to all.

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